When the hope fades

When your last hope disappears, and you wonder about the next day

if the next day will still be the Monday, or you will be a dead body with no regard to the name of the day

when the light dwindles, and you cannot see beyond your mental limit of perception

you just believe what you saw in the past, and that makes you grasp for every last breath

If I can see the world again, I hope that I should have the power to make it better, where hope doesn't ever fade, where I am not powerless and could save the light from dwindling. I hope I will be able to change that world

Regret

So I have got a regret email today from the "prestigious" Arsha Vidya Mandir, AVM, and so do many other parents.

I (or I say "We" for all souls like me) then retrospect all the aspects of that 30-minute talk with Arsha's Selectors. My wife and I have done almost 300 hours research about the school before appearing for it.  She has watched all their videos a 1000 times, like them so much that we zeroed that this is the only school where we want our daughter to spend her 12 years.  My daughter desperately wants to go to that school, and she keeps me reminding every day.

We got through the round one and with that came immense joy, that all just not only just vanished after the Regret mail in round two but also, came with a grave setback.

I kept on thinking at what point in those 30 minutes I have made a mistake.  Did my child (a 3-year-old kid) act weird when they have "tested" her for their parameters?  It is all useless.  

The email which just says - "deeply regret" without any hint of why is the saddest thing I ever had in my life.  And I know I share this with many other parents across the world who love their children more than anything else.  At the moment I felt that it is an end of the world.

The utterly opaque process for these so-called "Tier 1" schools make us feel so little. This, I think, is harassment; of the kids, and of the parents. And I am talking about not just AVM but of so many others too.  The one thing which these people sitting in the high castle failed to understand is the detrimental effect of such process.

People were discussing backdoor entry in many of these school made me feel sadder.  I am a common man, I don't have any backdoors in literally anything. And I don't like making a backdoor as well.  I feel that it is an injustice to so many others such as myself.